This Winter Is Messin' With My Mind!!

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Cheeeeeeers Chuckleheads, and a Happy Hump Day to you all.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH0Jq_rZjBX0kzYgjKq4oz58PQXRwElyoVWYnqUphioSxlCW9E-lS2D51PTtcSPEpZDNmK99q9xn7WZMCjeG2oIYXfMWxz4M-vY1z4-3hHm3ed74tr5n-3xNBNpCF1qwA3-9IUGER98zZA/s1600/025.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="291" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH0Jq_rZjBX0kzYgjKq4oz58PQXRwElyoVWYnqUphioSxlCW9E-lS2D51PTtcSPEpZDNmK99q9xn7WZMCjeG2oIYXfMWxz4M-vY1z4-3hHm3ed74tr5n-3xNBNpCF1qwA3-9IUGER98zZA/s1600/025.JPG" width="400" /></a>Y’know?  This winter is messing with my mind, my innate good-nature, and my body.  This winter is a wicked pissah!!<br /><br />The previous two winters, at least here in Bagwine, Ohio, have been very above average…not so cold, not a lot of snow, but this winter? <br /><br />The winter of 2013-14 has brought the “average” Ohio winter back to its average by being really nasty and really hurtful.<br /><br />We have suffered through wind chill driven temps to 40 below.  It’s snows nearly every day.  It’s gray, gloomy, and menacing 85% of each and every week.<br /><br />Listen to me, I am a guy who enjoys a bit of snow, a bit of booger-freezing temps, and some chaotic slip-sliding away traffic highlights on the news, but damn…<br /><br />This winter, in a word…Sucks.<br /><br />I hate this winter, mainly because, while I enjoy being a realist and having some self-control, and a “whatever will be, will be” attitude about all things uncontrollable…<br /><br />I wish I could control Mother Nature enough that I could stick an ice pick crafted by Mother Nature’s very own uncaring hand, and ram it through her cold, callous, and unforgiving frozen heart…several times over.<br /><br />Ma Nature, needs to die.  And even if I have to have a sex-change operation to make it realistic, I have no qualms about being the axe-wielding Lizzie Borden who strikes her down.<br /><br />Hell…Even the days run together.  I never know what day it is, and neither does my boss.  When I get to work he will ask me…<i>“What the hell day is it?”</i><br /><br />I nearly always reply with the correct answer, but for winter-driven self-assurance, I add a question mark to my reply…<br /><br /><i>“Wednesday?”</i><br /><br />Oh dear GAWD…this winter cannot end soon enough.  As I type this, we are getting hammered yet again by the dastardly douche bag that is Mother Nature, and the snow is falling like the anti-manna from the sky.<br /><br />Am I bitter?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-j8juvnUgzGccYALPoN0J_WsoKzOxE5i_kIkqL8xByuYPwR-ZPeEWHe-TWIK9Nu7Z2VEz790VeiOyZ0cs_SubEkMiQBh2w0IJhHkmb7_ljVvdSKk3CjhvsHrOW39hzfCatlcUPtR2bg0b/s1600/Heavy+Snow.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="252" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-j8juvnUgzGccYALPoN0J_WsoKzOxE5i_kIkqL8xByuYPwR-ZPeEWHe-TWIK9Nu7Z2VEz790VeiOyZ0cs_SubEkMiQBh2w0IJhHkmb7_ljVvdSKk3CjhvsHrOW39hzfCatlcUPtR2bg0b/s1600/Heavy+Snow.jpg" width="400" /></a>You’re Goddamn right I am.<br /><br />The last two months have yielded nothing other than a ghastly, ice cold furnace that blows out nothing more than frozen confetti from the sky, and sub-zero heartache upon my soul…and more importantly, upon my nether regions.<br /><br />And you know what?<br /><br />I want my nether regions to be able to cooperate with my libido for at least a couple of more years.  I’m not asking for much.<br /><br />I just want an average winter, which complies with the length of my manhood and with my average libido.<br /><br />See?<br /><br />During the winter season, I always tell Schmoop, that for every inch of snow we get, you will get an inch of Matt-Man<br /><br />Well folks, we've had like 36 inches of snow this winter, which means one thing...<br /><br />Yours truly has had to have sex with Schmoop <strike>10</strike> <strike>12</strike> 18 times the past two months!!<br /><br />Thanks a lot Mother Nature; your demands are set way too high...and I hate you!!<br /><br /><i>Cheers!!</i><br /><br /><i>Matt-Man</i><br /><br /><a href="mailto:mattmaniws@ymail.com">mattmaniws@ymail.com</a><br /><a href="https://twitter.com/MattMan_IWS" target="_blank"><span style="color: blue;">@mattman_iws</span></a><br /><a href="https://www.facebook.com/mattmaniws" target="_blank"><span style="color: blue;">My Facebook Page</span></a></div>

This Winter Is Messin' With My Mind!!

Cheeeeeeers Chuckleheads, and a Happy Hump Day to you all. Y’know?  This winter is messing with my mind, my innate good-nature, and my body....

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