Weight Gain and Pregnancy... son of a...

I'm not sure there is a truly a polite way to tell an overweight person that they are, in fact, overweight.  All I know is that I know I'm overweight, and I don't want to be reminded that I am, especially whenever I'm in an already vulnerable position.<br /><br />There's nothing like being told you're overweight as you're sitting in the obstetrician's office with no pants on (all for no reason, might I add!). <br /><br />I guess it was only a matter of time before this conversation occurred.  I was so proud up to this point that my baby doctor had yet to address my weight.  I figured I was doing well, not gaining too much, since they never said a word to me about it. <br /><br />It was only just last week after I had an appointment with a surgeon, over those dreadful hemorrhoids, that I learned what my current weight was - 269 lbs.  I was 240 lbs when I got pregnant.  Then I lost about 5 lbs due to the sickness.  So I've gained roughly 30 lbs so far with this pregnancy.  I was also pleasantly surprised at that number, since at my heaviest when starting this journey, I weighed in at 263 lbs. <br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheZl1zULr-ASTjk8C89KNlqT_G3OhWkdVnFFhVUOIu6okt0WxY8-8TKvAVX91VnhbSKRql_7w8oEH8cLCR9zChLLLEzs6jzE4-tNYArpmwfipnOdsUXMEnySv9Ob-kL_1I2oI_WEpeW_I/s1600/30+weeks+pregnant.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheZl1zULr-ASTjk8C89KNlqT_G3OhWkdVnFFhVUOIu6okt0WxY8-8TKvAVX91VnhbSKRql_7w8oEH8cLCR9zChLLLEzs6jzE4-tNYArpmwfipnOdsUXMEnySv9Ob-kL_1I2oI_WEpeW_I/s400/30+weeks+pregnant.jpg" width="266" /></a></div><br /><br />Now, don't get me wrong.  Obviously those numbers mentioned above are nothing to celebrate.  Still, all of my blood work and vitals and tests always come back with flying colors.  My blood pressure and heart rate are always excellent (they say!), and so despite my heftiness, I thought I was doing pretty well.<br /><br />Today I went in to the doctor because I might have a urinary tract infection, though I have to wait a few days for the results.  My practice is made up of many, many doctors and midwives, so I have yet to see the same person twice.   Today, for the first time, I was not happy.  I went in complaining about sharp, shooting pain in my cervical area, along with pain in my bladder every time I stood up.  I've also been having a lot of pressure in my pelvis.  The doctor stood there, and in all of her snarkiness, basically told me that everything I was experiencing was normal.  I have even been having cramps off and on, and so I was getting really worried about what was happening.  She basically said, "You're pregnant, what did you expect?"  Well, gee, I don't know - I've never been pregnant before!<br /><br />But, apparently the more important topic on her agenda was my 4 lbs weight gain in the two weeks since I had last been there.  She said I should not be gaining any more weight between now and the delivery date!  Not that I want to gain weight, but honestly, I'm not trying to gain weight either - it's just happening.<br /><br />Now, none of this is news to me.  I know the recommended weight gain for pregnancy varies depending on your starting weight (the heavier you are, the less it should be).  Still, I can promise you that I don't sit here and gorge myself.  In fact, I have a hard enough time eating everyday as it is.  In all honesty, if it didn't make me so sick, I could go all day and not eat.  I simply do not desire food.  For the first time in my life - I DO NOT DESIRE FOOD!  Now certainly, I'm not eating healthfully either.  Too much stuff initiates heartburn and nausea so I eat whatever I can keep down.  Still, for her to say that to me was like knocking the wind out of me.  It reminded me of times as a pre-teen, going to the pediatrician and him telling me, "All you have to do is eat your fruits and vegetables and not eat junk, and you'll lose the weight."  Easy for a "civilian" to say <i>(sidenote: "civilian" is a term a former Weight Watchers leader used for naturally skinny people who don't worry much about eating and obsessing over food)</i>. <br /><br />The fact is, this doctor rubbed me the wrong way before she even got started on the weight lecture, but that sure was the cherry on top. <br /><br />Sometimes I feel like even though doctors are supposed to be the experts, they just aren't.  They don't know what it's like to be in my shoes (or any other overweight person's shoes), unless they've stood in those shoes before.  I didn't get the impression that she had - given how she bragged about giving birth to triplets despite being the "tiniest person in this entire practice - tehe".  Ugh! <br /><br />I left today's appointment feeling totally blown and defeated.  She almost made me feel like I came in for nothing, even though I'm convinced I have a UTI.  It just doesn't make me feel like I can trust someone and what they say to me, when they make a mockery out of my circumstances. <br /><br /><br />

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